so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize