Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
