That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
