I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
