Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
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