Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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