And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
