they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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