Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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