Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
