There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
