Having a random hookup so left but love u
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
