i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
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