That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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