I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
