Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
