My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
