do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize