Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
