Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
