Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
