i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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