You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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