your parents love me but you hate me
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
