it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
