No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
