I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
