standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
