i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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