It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
