We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
