sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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