I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
