Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
