apparently the secret to your success is patron
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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