I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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