Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
