i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
drinking out of a sandbucket again
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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