Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
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