Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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