Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
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