i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
