i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize