What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
