All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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