I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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