Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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