You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize