How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
It was confusing and full of hummus
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize