The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
ugly people sure do ruin things
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
